Walk

When I look at you I see the past
I ignore what you have become
Pay no mind to the changes
I cling onto what we had.
It was so perfect,
so beautiful
Change hasn't made it ugly,
it just rearranged its beauty.
One I dont understand
One I have chosen to not deal with

But you seem happy with this new position
You have finally found yourself,
while I still search around for the remains of your past identity.
They help me define myself
Such a big part of who I am
Who I was,
Who I want to remain,
and I try to hold on,
I try my best
but time has taken you away from me;
it loosened my grip while I got distracted by the happenings in my life
it led you away.

I have to let you change.
I don't want to,
don't be decieved
the thought of stopping you has crossed my mind.
But I care too much
I want you to discover yourself,
understand your life,
grow as an individual,
and if I am a part of that
I will appreciate it.

I have learnt that I must let it be.
They say if you love something
let it go,
and if it was always yours,
it will come back.
Loving should never involve holding on,
pulling back,
it should be seamlessly moving along
gliding souls,
side by side.
There should be peace
a serenity in our movement.

So I wont fight it
I'll try to enjoy it.
When I hold onto what you used to be,
I ignore what you have become
I miss out on the amazing chages,
the growth,
the beauty in moving forward,
and focus on the pain of being left behind.
But I have changed,
without realizing it
I guess I was so busy .watching you,
that I ignored me.
So now I will let you be,
while I sit and try to understand me.

We don't exist anymore,
at least not in the way I had imagined.
We have become different
and need to find our way back to each other,
both taking steps towards this
not one of us running
while the other's feet drags on the cobblestones of our destiny.

We might not get here at the same time,
our jouneys will surely be different.
If we get here,
when we get here,
I guess we will be what we have always meant to be

See,
I have learnt to accept life.
When it throws me lemons,
I dont make lemonade
I bring out my vodka
remember my experiences
and throw life in the cup
learning to handle problems with past knowledge
while absorbing the new.

So I wish you the best of luck,
I hope you find pure happiness
because this is me letting go.
Walking away,
as I casually glance back to make sure you are still standing.
I will always care about you,
but I will not wait for you to understand your feelings for me.
So I will walk.